News Flash! (Warning: Heavy Sarcasm Advisory in Affect)

November 8, 2006

So here’s a shock. Britney Spears and “K-Fed” have decided to split.

Is there really anyone out there that didn’t see this coming? I’m all for Britney usually, but Kevin Federline is an everloving douche. I’ve seen him perform once and decided that I’d rather listen to gangsta rap. Which is saying something.

I have to wonder though. How did the conversation go when they decided to divorce? I imagine something like this:

K: I hate you now.
B: But I’m a slave for you!
K: Baby, my solo career is taking off. I’m a successful singer and didn’t need you to begin with. I could have gotten here on sheer talent. Later.

I honestly hope he thinks he has talent. That he doesn’t think the only reason he’s popular is that he was married to a pop star. Delusional people make me chuckle.

So long Kevin Federline! After the custody trial, you are destined to fade into obscurity! And not a moment too soon.

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